Glamorized Sin: What Are You Really Losing?

Yesterday in church, our pastor Brandon Williams briefly mentioned that many people will make the argument that they're scared to give their lives to Christ because they are afraid of what they might lose. I can 100% identify with this. Throughout college, I struggled with a bit of a double life. I wanted to give my life to God. I desperately wanted his love and healing touch in my life. I yearned for salvation and redemption. But I also had this image of what I would have to give up in order to receive that. I thought of it as a sort of barter system. I imagined God saying to me, "Okay, I will save you, but only if you first give up the sex, drinking, parties, and any other fun activities. Thanks."

First of all, that's not how salvation works at all. You do not earn your salvation. You cannot buy it with sacrifices. If you could, there would be no need for Jesus to die for you. Submit yourself to Jesus first and he'll guide and support you in anything else.

But if you think about it, what would you really be giving up? What is it that people are so afraid of losing? I think there are two major flaws in this line of thinking (aside from that not being an accurate depiction of salvation).

Flaw #1: The world is selling a lie and you've bought into it. Glamorized sin. You've watched a lot of movies and TV shows and listened to a lot of club songs. You see and hear images of people getting wasted, dancing the night away, making out with strangers, and having "liberating" sexual experiences with no strings attached. Or you've seen countless images of non-married couples having sex. And you truly believe this is reality. Whenever I imagined what I would be losing, it was never something I actually HAD. I would picture myself going to a party, dressed sexy and feeling confident, throwing back shots and dancing and laughing and having a great time. I would be surrounded by my friends and we would be having the time of our lives. Or I thought about my relationship with my boyfriend at the time. I would think about a handful of romantic and sweet moments we had shared and I would think that sex was an essential expression of this deep, powerful love that held us together.

This was not reality. The reality was that I would go to clubs or parties, feeling shy and awkward. Too self-conscious to dance or mingle, so I would drink. Usually in the form of chugging something or taking shots--the quicker the better. And usually I would drink too much because it's really hard to monitor your level of intoxication when you're drinking quickly. I would end up dancing like a crazy person, perhaps feeling sexy in the moment, but in reality being a hot mess. I know this from seeing pictures or videos of myself in this state. Usually my hair is a giant frizzy mess, I'm sweating, my makeup is smeared, and I have some crazed look on my face - distant eyes and an unnatural smile. And I would end the night groaning in my bed, trying to control the pounding in my head and swirling room around me. Once I even ended up in the bathroom, in a pile of my own vomit, unsure of how exactly I got there. Fun and sexy, indeed.

And that relationship? It mostly involved fighting, feelings of inadequacy and loneliness, and sex that mostly felt obligated and not desired. There was nothing fulfilling about it.

Why would anyone be afraid to give all that up? Why did I hold onto that for so long? Did I really think that what God had to offer was not as good as THAT? Which brings me to...

Flaw #2: You don't know Jesus. If you did, you would know that what he offers is far, far better than anything you might be losing. And I'm not talking about the prosperity gospel. I'm not saying he promises perfect circumstances of health, wealth, and happiness. But he does offer peace and joy through all of life's circumstances, if you trust in Him. And he provides unending love and mercy and grace. Living in His love means that you don't have to go to parties or bars to feel connected to people. You don't have to resort to alcohol to feel comfortable in your own skin. If you pursue Him and grow closer to Him, He will teach you to love yourself more. You won't need to seek acceptance and fulfillment from an empty relationship because Jesus will provide all the acceptance and fulfillment you need. Not to say community and romantic relationships aren't important, but you don't NEED them to be complete. They may build you up and encourage you, but they won't fill the voids your imperfect life has dealt you. Only Jesus will do that. If you knew Him, you would be running toward Him, open-armed, with wild abandon - you would eagerly throw that empty, ugly, life to the wayside.

My advice? Flip the flaws and address them in reverse order. Don't worry about what you're giving up. Start with Jesus. Get to know Him. Read God's word to learn more about his character. Talk to him through prayer/journaling and LISTEN through meditation/quiet time.  Once you get to know Jesus, He will reveal the reality of the rest. No longer will you see these things through the dirty lens of the media and society. Jesus will shine light on them so that you can see them as they truly are. Then, sacrifice things as you feel called. And look to God for strength and guidance in doing so. I promise, if you stop believing the lie of glamorized sin, and focus your energy on seeking God, you just won't worry about whether what your losing is worth it. I promise you will see that living for God is worth it. All of it.