The Life Monster is Waiting for Me

I know school and college and graduate school is real life.

If not, then what have I been doing these past 27 years??

(okay for the first five or so I wasn't in school yet)

 But I can't help but feel that "real life" is about to start.

I'm graduating with my Masters in December.

DECEMBER!

And right before that? In November?

That's when the maybe we'll get pregnant time starts!

So this basically means that in 2 months I will be searching for my first

full-time job. Not just full-time hours,

but like for real, full-time, benefited staff.

And I could be pregnant.

If that isn't "real life" waiting just around the bend

then I don't know what is.

And we know how I feel about the pregnancy thing,

so I'll just stick to the job issue.

I have this crazy mix of emotions.

I'm excited.

I've been working toward this for so long.

And it'll be great to have a definite answer when someone asks 

"What do you do?"

And I'll be working towards retirement.

And have real sick leave and vacation time.

Whoop!

But I'm also nervous.

For the past 8 years any job that I've held 

has either been "temporary" 

or had the word "student" attached to it somehow.

Now I'll likely be held to higher standards

and have more responsibilities.

Not that I can't handle that.

I know I can.

But still. It'll be an adjustment.

And what if I can't find a job right away?

Thankfully my current employer has agreed to keep me 

as a temporary employee until I find something

or they have a full-time position available.

But how is it going to feel if I don't get an interview?

Or if I get an interview but not the job?

I feel like it's easier to get graduate positions and internships.

What if I'm not hot stuff after all? 

(partly kidding about that...)

All this to say,

I'm feeling a little anxious about what is to come.

I'm looking forward to the exciting new changes,

but I'm also a little apprehensive.

I'm not sure I even know how to not be a student! 

Well, 

if that's really a problem

I'll just get my doctorate! 

Source: flickr.com via Christy on Pinterest

~Christy~